A 14-year-old accused of killing a classmate recorded his violent obsessions, fixations on prayer and detailed plans for self-improvement in a journal made public by prosecutors on Friday.

At the bottom of a printout on mass murderers, Michael Hernandez scrawled this message: "Will become a serial killer."

The journal -- released by the Miami-Dade State Attorney's Office following public records requests -- offers a glimpse into the conflicted mind of an eighth-grader who dwelled on common teenage problems such as acne and homework, but also fixated on cults and murder.

It also might shed light on how a straight-A student allegedly could murder his best friend, then confess to detectives but offer no explanation.

According to police, Hernandez packed a serrated knife and a latex glove in his book bag before heading off to school, where he stabbed 14-year-old Jaime Gough in the boy's bathroom on Feb. 3. Gough bled to death in a bathroom stall.

A grand jury indicted Hernandez on a first-degree murder charge for the slaying. He will be tried as an adult.

Defense attorney Richard Rosenbaum said the release of his client's journal could hamper his ability to find an impartial jury.

"It makes it much more difficult for people to keep an open mind," said Rosenbaum, who would not comment on the journal's contents. He also would not say whether he plans to pursue an insanity defense.

In the 41 pages that were released, Hernandez's comes across as a troubled boy who was largely preoccupied with death, perfection and compiling lists. The documents were released in accordance with state laws that make much of the prosecution's evidence public after it is given to defense attorneys.

Hernandez compiled exhaustive lists of violent video games and movies, kept instructions for making Molotov cocktails and explosives, doodled crosses on some pages, and wrote "White Power" under a swastika on ruled school paper. Hernandez is Hispanic.

One page seems to be a lengthy to-do list in which he reminds himself to workout everyday, read the Bible, worship and pray daily, learn to draw, switch pens every two weeks and "learn to be a pimp (sex)."

Another is a list of things he strives to be: perfect, dark, psychotic, isolated, smart, sophisticated, exact.

Yet another page is filled with short phrases that detail conflicted thoughts, such as: carve cross, take right eye, leave note, stay alone, never forget God ever, have a cult and plan a mass kidnapping for new world, be an expert thief.

There is even a list of jobs he might have been interested in at the time: psychologist, vice president of a company or "anything that pays."

The final 10 pages of the journal resemble unfinished lists with the headings: weapons, body counts, names and what was done.

Leonard Haber, a local forensic psychologist who has testified in child murder cases, said the journal seems to be the work of an angry and deeply disturbed teen obsessed with perfection and death. The boy's preoccupation with religion coupled with his fixation on body sculpting suggests he struggled with a need to overcome an intense self-loathing, Haber said.

"It's frightening, the context of this, the morbidity, the ruthlessness, the coldness of this," said Haber, who reviewed the journal entries but does not know Hernandez. "There's something crying out in here that says, `Look at me, I've done it and I 'd like to be around to see what happens when you see what I've done.'"

Stephen Harper, a veteran public defender who once headed the juvenile division in Miami-Dade County, said the notes could be used to argue two very different views: the writer is inherently bad or in desperate need of help.

"If you take the position that this is a sign of evil, that's one perspective," Harper said. "Another perspective is, `Wait a minute. How does a child that young get to the point that he's acting this way?'"

For juvenile suspects, both perspectives need to be reconciled, Harper said. But the justice system has increasingly not allowed for that, he said.

"I have found with adolescents that they are still developing, they are still treatable," he said. "How did he get here? Is he salvageable? Is he mentally ill? What are the treatment needs? Those issues are not necessarily adequately considered when somebody is in adult court."

If convicted, Hernandez could receive a life sentence without the possibility of parole.

But Hernandez's fate could be a different one if a Broward County legislator can successfully change the sentencing guidelines for children who are charged as adults. Under the proposed law, child murderers would be given the opportunity for parole after serving at least eight years of their life sentences, especially if they have committed no other violent crimes.

Sen. Steve Geller, D-Hallandale, filed the bill in the current legislative session to prevent another case like the one of Lionel Tate, who was only 12 when he received a life sentence in the death of a playmate. He said he was trying out wrestling moves when he killed 6-year-old Tiffany Eunick.

Rosenbaum represented Tate on his appeal. Now 17, Tate was released last month after pleading guilty to second-degree murder.

Diana Marrero can be reached at dmarrero@sun-sentinel.com or 305-810-5005.